Bisexuality - Life As A Unicorn

By Alex Wilcock

What is a unicorn? If we take the mainstream definition, and not the one that has popped up on tinder recently (1), a unicorn is a type of mythical horse, with a horn that Lord Voldemort lusts after because he’s a totally normal guy like that.

What is bisexuality? While everyone is entitled to have their own interpretation of what exactly their bisexual identity means to them, put simply bisexuality is the attraction to two or more genders (2). 

What do unicorns and bisexuals have in common? Well, according to the media, we simply do not exist.

Let’s look at the evidence, shall we?

Source: E.Wilder via Canva

When Piper attempts to identify herself as bisexual, or bi, in Orange is the New Black, she is widely mocked by the others, including her to-be girlfriend, Alex, until we are finally given a throw away line (um…thanks?) in the final season.

Even when intentions are well-meaning and media tries to raise awareness for bisexuality and biphobia, damage can be caused. This can be seen in the show Big Mouth, where in the episode ‘Rankings’ bisexuality is dismissed as “so binary”, as well as in Will & Grace with their episode ‘bi-plane’.

The reason? Bisexuality is just not well understood, and as such, most media does not portray the bisexual experience in a positive and considered way. While there have been some out-and-proud bicons in recent times (thank you, Rosa from B99) there is a distinct lack of bisexual characters in our media. The bisexual characters that do exist are far from representative of the diversity of what is one of the largest parts of the queer community (3).

Why is this the case? The biphobia of our media reflects a much bigger problem, and that is the biphobia of our society.

Biphobia is defined as an aversion toward bisexuality, and it entails behaviors or beliefs that perpetuate an array of negative stereotypes about bisexual people (4). There are some common ways we see that in our society – with people accusing bisexuals of ‘faking’ their identity, ‘going through a phase’ and erasure where bisexual people have their identities relegated by others to either gay or straight, depending on who they date. Our society caters for those who are attracted to only one gender, and so society generally struggles to comprehend that you can be – and indeed, we are – attracted to multiple genders at the same time, and attraction exists in some shape or form regardless of the gender(s) you are in a relationship with.

This has lasting impacts on the bisexual community. There is strong evidence that the mental health of bisexual people is, on average, worse than those who identify as straight, gay or lesbian (5), and a large reason for this is due to erasure of their identity. Bisexuals face biphobia not just from society, but from their friends and partners who refuse to validate and support their sexuality. This issue is particularly true for bisexuals who are in heterosexual relationships, where there is a higher risk of erasure. This leads many bisexual people to question their sense of self, and feel disconnected from their communities.

The road to ending biphobia is long and difficult, as is the case with all identities in the queer community. But there are ways we can address it in our every day lives. We can demand more accurate representations from our media. We can encourage more diverse characters in our media. And we can address the biphobia that we may have in ourselves, so that we can validate the bisexual people in our lives and affirm their identities, regardless of the gender(s) of the people they are in a relationship with.

(1) https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Unicorn

(2) https://www.minus18.org.au/articles/what's-the-difference-between-bisexual-and-pansexual

(3) https://www.hrc.org/resources/bisexual-faq

(4) https://studybreaks.com/thoughts/biphobia-and-erasure/

(5) https://www1.racgp.org.au/ajgp/2019/march/bisexual-mental-health